Monday, July 21, 2008
Foreign Country behind my house
My backyard is like a foreign country that I've never been to. I never use my backyard because it does not interest me in any kind of manner. When I look out my screen door I realize that I have a wonderful backyard that I never use. My yard consists of a pool, a bonfire pit and a spacious patio. Some might think I'm crazy for not using my backyard but I say, "fuck the backyard," I have a luxurious room to chill in.
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3 comments:
I think your story needs more. You have an idea so go for it! Add in why you dont use your back yard. Why you say "fuck the backyard." You can go into so much detail to grab the readers attention. Try using the 5 senses like seeing, hearing, smelling..etc..such as the patio that smell of..or the beautiful blue water of my pool.. even though you dont like your backyard you can still add these things.
Nik,
I think that you are on to something, but it is still unclear. Think about how the "things" in your backyard (bonfire, pool) make it either unattractive or inviting. Is it because you'd rather be inside that you "fuck the backyard" or that it is a good excuse for not going out there?
To tell you the truth you need more of explanation about why you dont care for your backyard.But you were truthful by saying you don't like your backyard you rather chill in your room. I understand were you're coming from that you rather relax in a comfortable room than be outside thats what you do,thats you cuz.Much respect!
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